Dealing with officials

From time to time everyone has to deal with officials, such as Benefits Agency staff, local council officers, doctors, teachers, employers, or staff from the investigation bodies, coroner’s court or police / prison service.

It can be difficult dealing with officials. Their decisions can have a big impact on your life. They might have to ask difficult questions that you feel are very personal or seem insensitive. It can be helpful to remember these things:

• All officials have bosses or managers more senior than them. This means that you can always take your case to someone higher up, if you feel you have been treated unfairly.
• Different organisations have specific systems and ways of doing things and this may not always seem like the best way for you, but be patient.
• Most officials are trained in client or customer awareness, but many of them haven’t been trained to deal with bereavement and grief. This is especially true of people who have no direct professional experience of dealing with bereaved people.
• They usually have to see a lot of people every day. Sometimes they have to keep you waiting, if earlier appointments or meetings last longer than expected.
• Some organisations have a customer charter or code of conduct, which describes what you can expect from their staff. If you are not happy with the treatment you have had, you can ask to see the code of conduct and make it clear where staff / officials have dealt with things in a way you didn’t like.

Tips on dealing with officials

• Always try and prepare before you meet with the official
• Try to stay calm even if the situation feels threatening or difficult
• Write down questions or points you want to make, in advance. If you are looking for facts or information make a note of them as you go along. (See section 1.3 Dealing with important information and facts).
• Find out the name of the person interviewing you. Keep a record of their name, and notes about what you discussed. This will help you if you need to speak to this person again about the same matter.
• If it helps, have your questions or answers available in writing, plus all relevant documents.
• Never hand over original documents – get them photocopied, or ask for them to be photocopied for you. (See section 1.3 Keeping Paperwork organised).
• Be patient, officials are usually working to a timetable.
• If you aren’t happy with how things are going, you can ask for clarification or ask for it to stop and arrange another time to finish it.
• Take someone along to support you. If you don’t want to deal with an interview on your own, ask a friend or family member, or your caseworker to come with you. Or you could ask for an advocate, or trained advisor to come with you, try contacting your Local Authority or Citizen’s Advice Bureau for support on this matter.